Lady, Lady, you're the one for me
you're the thing that i need most
like a glass of water on a hot day
you're the reason i wake up in the mornin
you're the sun up above, you give me warmth and love
yeah girl, yeah baby, yeah girl
but your ex boyfriend, that faggot keeps on talking shit
so where's his job? Where's he chill?
I'll punch him in his grill
but now you're mine, you're so fine
I'll take you to Red Lobster
eat some shrimp and talk a bit
then I'll lick yo pussy lips
and i'll lick yo clit cos you the shit
yo my bitch , ill hold yo hand
you tell yo friends that im your man
and here comes the rap part
now shes the one I been rappin about
before i realized i been rappin bout her
my main bird, better than them girls that look like 20 other girls
who look like 20 other girls dont even come close
she's my little missle, cripple other bitches quick like
my shawtys so crunk yo we got matchin dunks
and we rock em on the 4th of the month when we met at the club
yo i gave her the rub then i gave her my number like
"shawty call me up"
she did, she didnt front and we been kickin it tight ever since like
all you dyke bitches need to go and fly a kite, go and die right.

Lady, girl, baby, thing
diamond of my life, the ocean, the sun, the moon
you know if Bob Marley came back to life i would kill him all over for you
cos I love you, i walk through 100 things full of gay male porn just lookin for you
buy you shoes with wings on em, I will buy you new fingers with rings on em
I would sing to satan and candy man and captain hook tell him cut me apart give my baby my heart cos she needs my heart
id start a society for a journey at the bottom of the sea

Too tired to do anything else.

was once a really sweet noise band in the late 80s

i wonder what my life would be like if i had my old friends, or different friends



i also wonder what it's like to have a best friend

RYAN MOSELY IS AWESOME


not joke

i like him a lot

too much reading - Packet Sniffing


too much watching - Zombie, Rescue Me

I want a Jellyfish :[

is cancer.


>:[

I love you friends, all of you. If I have ever called you friend, past or present.


We are a good family, and you should all know that.

who?



Experiments have proven that it's just too fragile.

Stranger: i have many women in california?
You: there are tons
Stranger: uauuuuuuu
You: i like the ones with the big butts
Stranger: big ass?
You: HHAHA
Stranger: brasilian is woman big ass
You: yeah thats why i love your women
You: it's the best
Stranger: y love brazil
Stranger: beach in brasil is the best of the world
You: get a girl with a big ass
Stranger: everybody brasilian have big ass
You: why do you think that is?
Stranger: live in country of the God
You: so by that logic, God loves big asses
You: that is wonderful
You: thank you, you have just given me the most profound realization

So my old buddy Crabbert invited me to a BBQ the other day. I hadn't seen him in a long time so I was stoked. "Hurry on over to the park!" he said. "What are you cooking, bro?" I asked. "Mincemeat, dude!"
STOKED!
I love mincemeat so I headed over pretty quick. I got there and a few skinny bitches were sittin around next to a barbecue having a good ole' conversation. I sat down and joined in. Boy, was I getting hungry. Crabbert routinely checked on the meat, and after about ten minutes it was done.
"Grab a plate, boys," said Crabbert.
He then proceeded to scoop a big ole slathera of mincemeat onto our plates. I was so excited to eat it up. I'd been dreaming of it for hours now.
So I take a bite...
and chew...
Pleasantly surprised, I don't spit it all out! It wasn't mincemeat, but. . .
It was mints meat! Minty meat? Delicious! I asked Crabbert if he had any more!

╔═══╗
║ ██║
╠═══╣
║╬▫▫║
╚═══╝

Ladies and gentlemen, this is my girlfriend:

fresh like whutt: my favorite kind of penis i will have to say is black. and i've had it all.. had.. it.. all.

00:12] OK OK Shark: ew
[00:12] OK OK Shark: fuck that show
[00:12] OK OK Shark: fuck it so hard
[00:12] OK OK Shark: i fucking loathe that show
[00:12] OK OK Shark: with every fiber of my being
[00:12] OK OK Shark: i want them all to burn fiery deaths
[00:12] dontfeelsosmall: LOLFR
[00:12] OK OK Shark: and then burn more in hell
[00:12] OK OK Shark: no no
[00:12] OK OK Shark: i want them to lose use of their vaginas
[00:13] OK OK Shark: but be alive
[00:13] OK OK Shark: i fucking hate that fucking show
[00:13] OK OK Shark: no substance and completle tasteless bullshit
[00:13] OK OK Shark: jesus fucking christ
[00:13] dontfeelsosmall: of course
[00:13] dontfeelsosmall: it appeals to lonely middle aged women
[00:13] dontfeelsosmall: who are like
[00:13] dontfeelsosmall: OH IF I'M OLD I CAN ALSO BE GLAMEROUS
[00:13] dontfeelsosmall: LIKE THEM
[00:13] dontfeelsosmall: a sex article writer, a publicist, an art gallery owner
[00:13] dontfeelsosmall: those are like
[00:13] dontfeelsosmall: theb ullshit jobs
[00:14] dontfeelsosmall: all women think they will attain
[00:14] dontfeelsosmall: and be really rich and fabulous
[00:14] OK OK Shark: hahahahaha
[00:14] OK OK Shark: so fucking true
[00:14] dontfeelsosmall: god
[00:14] dontfeelsosmall: i went to see hairspray in theaters with casandra (yeah..) and the audience was like
[00:14] dontfeelsosmall: full of cheering fat middle aged women
[00:15] dontfeelsosmall: because the main character was a fat girl who got the guy
[00:15] dontfeelsosmall: that is the type of women who watch sex and the city
[00:15] OK OK Shark: hahahhahaha
[00:15] OK OK Shark: hahahaha
[00:15] OK OK Shark: omg
[00:15] OK OK Shark: LJing this

So last night I had a dream that I was with Casandra. We went to a pizza restaurant where you could order custom pizza slices. Brian Goett ordered a sausage pizza with whole slabs of steak on top, he ate all of it. It ruled. I bet that would make an awesome pizza IRL.
I ordered what I thought was going to be a delicious Mediterranean style pizza but was just a pita crust with some chicken slices, crumbled goat chees and spinach leaves, WTF? Yeah, I remember the exact ingredients because I looked down at it and memorized it.
After that me, Brian, Cas and some unseen but "familiar feeling" friends walked into the back where there was a weird loft eating/lounging area and on the way we come across a group of kids from my past - you know "those" kids. One of them happens to be ***-***** and it was hilarious, my heart raced even in my dreamland. Brian sees this and he goes over to talk to him and say hello, while doing that mocking-you-at-the-same-time-because-I-used-to-be-your-idol-when-you-were-lamer-than-you-are-now thing. He looks over at me periodically as if to gesture ". . .is such a douchebag, I got you." and it ruled. After that we climb a ladder to the top deck and Johnny Lee is there (he looked particularly FRESH OFF THE BOAT), then Madeleine I think. Random as hell.

It sort of fades out after that.


HIGHLIGHTS OF STEAK COVERED PIZZA, BRIAN GOETT AND ***-***** being ridiculed.

Why are they?

Tell your emotions to grow up.




Yeah, you know who the fuck I'm talking to. You best be realizin' motherfuck'.

I dont know if you knew, but. . .

Tpain is the best.

He is the ultimate
Nothing is better than listening to anything Tpain has done.



The End.

. . .of music.